Welcome to Adept Dad, it’s a pleasure to have you here with me.
I have the pleasure of raising 3 amazing boys with my loving wife Alexis.
Am I an expert at being a Dad?
Not at all, there isn’t a Dad test you have to pass to show the world that you’re qualified.
I expect that i’ll know if I “passed the test” when my children enter society as adults.
My wife and I continually reinforce a strong set of values such as ethics, kindness and selflessness. Having a strong set of meaningful values is critical in defining who you are as a person, and it’s been the foundation of our parenting journey.
The most important thing I’ve learned thus far is that there is no 100% right way to parent. Take each day as it comes and enjoy the journey. Every year gets faster, and before you know it, it will be over.
Adept Dad was born with the goal to empower men to be super dads, and to dispel the stereotype of the inept, clueless father figure.
You’ve no doubt noticed the countless articles and websites dedicated to helping people become great parents, but there’s one major problem, 99% of them are directed exclusively towards women.
And you know what?
That makes perfect sense, I wouldn’t expect it to be any other way.
For generations, men have been taught that caring for children is something that they shouldn’t be concerned with – “It’s women’s work”.
Well, guess what?
Like many of you, I’m not the last generation. I’m in a partnership with wife, and that means we’re a team.
The Dad of today isn’t just interested in the lives of his children, he’s actively planning and shaping the adults that they will become.
Firstly, thanks for taking the time to check out Adept Dad, and a double thank you for going so far as to read about me – it’s humbling.
I’m a born and bred Aussie.
My interests include:
– Being a super dad!
– Helping others achieve their goals
– Digital marketing
Things that i’m passionate about and that drives me:
– Environmentalism – I want to leave the Earth a better place for my children and all future generations.
I can vividly recall the first time that it hit me that I was going to be a dad. It was the most exciting, yet equally worrisome feeling i’d ever had. I distinctly remember feel hot all over my body, but especially my face, as I realized just how under prepared I was for the journey into fatherhood.
For most people the realization occurs with the pregnancy test results, and the excitement of finally getting that faint positive line of success. If not the test, then all the doctors visits and general clunkiness (is that even a word?) that follows normally does the trick.
Not for me though.
My wife and I struggled for a long time to conceive our first born (and even longer for the 2nd child). We tried for a long time to conceive naturally, and I know that sounds like a heap of fun, and it was at first, but it also takes a toll.
The constant disappointment was difficult to work through, so we decided to get medical help.
The short version of the story is that my wife suffers from Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome or PCOS for short, and so my wife had to take a small concoction of drugs to help with ovulation. The longer version of this story involves a terribly old fuddy-duddy mumbling doctor, me providing a man sample that tested my virility and manliness, and the somewhat unusual proposition that the fuddy-duddy doctor would impregnate my wife with a turkey baster… No, i’m not joking, but that’s a long story that would need to be written with drink in hand.
Back to the point, we did the cool 3D pictures, you know the ones where the baby looks like a space alien wandering around inside your partner, but even that didn’t really sink in. Like I’m not stupid, I knew my wife was pregnant, but the gravity of the situation and what that meant for me, her, us, our family hadn’t triggered.
The day it all dawned on me was in one of those birthing classes that you are encouraged to attend as a soon to be parent. Ours was a very busy class, with close to 15-20 pregnant women and their partners.
I don’t think I was overly sheltered growing up. I knew about the birds and the bees and how babies we made and born, but for the most part the, shall we say, graphic details of how the baby actually comes into the world was never really something I had ever had direct exposure to.
Yet walking into the birthing class, there it was on the big screen with sound turned right up for all to experience with no filtering whatsoever. It was at that moment that it really hit me. I’m not sure if it was the video, or the very white pale faces of pregnant women and their partners that did it, but it was definitely that day that I knew what was going down.
From that point on I’ve been “consciously” travelling through the fatherhood journey and doing what I can to navigate the many challenges that come our way.
As my family matures, it’s becoming clearer to me that being a parent (Mother or Father) is defined by a series of tiny moments in time. For the most part they are more likely than not to be forgotten as soon as they happen, but each one slowly but surely nudges you and your children along the path in a certain direction.
Conception aside, I can’t look back and pinpoint any one single event along the path that has shaped my children’s lives drastically, but I do know that it’s the little things that are done consistently that compound on each other that defines who your child will ultimately become.
To that end, I feel it’s important to set out with guiding principals or a north star for you as a parent and what it is you want for your children.
I can’t remember where I heard it, but at some point in time it was imprinted on my brain that we as parents are raising adults, not children. It’s stuck with me ever since and it’s helped my wife and I guide our children through the challenges of parenthood.
I’ve always been good at helping others to achieve their goals, and I get great enjoyment at seeing others succeed, so I knew that I had to work with people who were either struggling to get where they wanted to be, or with those who shared my passions.
So while Adept Dad is flavored towards Dads, I’ll cover a range of topics that you’ll hopefully enjoy and find relevant to you and your goals in life.
Congratulations on getting to this point. I hope you will stick around and share your fatherhood journey with me. If that sounds like you, there are a couple of things you can do.
1 – Sign up for my newsletter
2 – Follow me on Facebook and Twitter
3 – Check out my most popular posts (there is something in them for everyone)
Thanks again for checking in.